Justin

I never buy ANYONE a present on pretty much ANY occasion...especially not flowers or jewelry: I hate them both. I prize functionality over aesthetics, almost always.

I have no fashion sense whatsoever. I wear ratty t-shirts, shorts, and white sneakers every single day. If it's cold out, I wear my one black hoodie and beanie cap that are torn and faded grey from overuse.

I don't ever wash the inside of my toilet bowl because all I do is put my crap in it so why do I care if it's clean? I apply variations of this philosophy to many aspects of life.

I have no sympathy for people who are responsible for their misfortunes: like fat people. And don't give me that genetic/metabolism crap. If you don't eat: I guarantee you'll lose weight.

Judging by the preference of everyone I've ever met (except my half-deaf father): I listen to music and TV way too loud.

I fart quite a bit. Oftentimes: it smells. I also sweat abnormally more than most people, and I rarely use deodorant. My body's highly asymmetrical.

I don't remember to brush my teeth as often as I probably should. I never floss. I only shave about once a week, at best. The quality of my skin is poor.

When I sleep on my back: I snore. I also roll around a LOT while sleeping.

I don't believe in old traditions or customs that no longer have any rational justification, and as such I have no manners, and am not chivalrous.

I'm known by many for saying inappropriate and insensitive things. I'm often the shmuck who says or asks something others are only thinking. I tell people what I think of them or their ideas, regardless of consequences or feelings.

I consider myself smarter than just about everyone. Most people bore me, some amuse me, very few interest me, virtually none impress me.

I HATE small-talk on phones about as much as I hate filling out paperwork. I can't dance, and I hate dancing. I also hate going out to places where the music is so loud that you have to scream to talk. I'm addicted to listening to my ipod everywhere I go.

I like to fancy myself a sailor, but I can only dog-paddle and I can't open my eyes under water. I like to claim I am an outdoorsmen and hiker, but I'm scared of spiders.

I try to focus on experiencing, since I easily get distracted reflecting, analyzing, and calculating.

I'm a mild hypochondriac. On more than one occasion I've been convinced I was having a heart-attack or otherwise suffering from something horrible. I'm also somewhat obsessive compulsive. I can listen to the same song over and over 40 times in a row, and I have a strong need to keep the things on my desk arranged geometrically.

Sometimes while walking down the street I will recall something funny and laugh out loud for no visible reason -- causing discomfort in nearby strangers. I also am prone to scratching myself in public.